What question are you asking?
I constantly get told that I am brave and lucky for all of the travelling I have done over the past 19 years. But, my thought is this:
I think, if you want something badly enough then you will just do it. You will take the risks, make the decisions and simply get up and go. A powerful question I always ask myself is ‘what will happen if I don’t do this?’ and that normally scares me more but gets me to take action!
I have been in this situation many times, asking myself what will happen if I don’t take this chance. And after I asked myself the question - I always took the chance! Living a life of regrets and wishing I would have taken more chances was something I never wanted to do.
Nowadays, after living and working in 11 countries over 17 years, I can look back on my life and realise how much travelling I have actually done and how many chances I have taken. Reflecting on all of my past decisions and experiences, I now realise that I have actually been quite brave afterall.
It only seems like a few years ago now, when I followed my instinct and left the UK after receiving some terrible and shocking news. I just wanted to leave for a while - escape from the dysfunctional situation that I found myself in.
At the time, I didn’t feel I had many choices, so I completed my teacher training. This seemed like the easiest way for me to be able to work abroad. Switzerland was at the top of my go-to list, but I ended up starting my journey in Turkey as I met some Turkish friends during my teacher training. It seemed relatively easy to gain some teaching experience there first and then head to Switzerland afterwards.
Awareness is a step
During my time in Turkey, I began to really grieve. I was then able to realise and admit to myself that the death of my father had been the reason I had been so depressed and had wanted to leave the UK in the first place. Up until that point I hadn't admitted it to myself. I felt that I didn’t deserve the level of pain that I was experiencing because he wasn’t my biological father, but once I let that go and admitted that I was grieving, I was able to start healing. Giving myself permission was my first step.
This was the beginning of my grief journey and I still had a long way to go, but the relief and knowledge of this awareness seemed life changing to me.
Do you need to give yourself permission to heal?
Would love to hear your thoughts, experiences and stories – feel free to email me